Fred E Hathaway

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Posts by Fred E Hathaway

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  40

  Would you have married a non JW

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when you were a good active jw, would you have considered marrying a non jw or was this completely out of the question..

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  Fred E Hathaway

  Only if she was interested in helping me & others progress spiritually, like I try to do with others. Regular meeting attendance is key to my success, even though I've been in a DF'd-like state for over 15 months. I've tried to help a few so far, some JW, some not. Sadly, nothing's worked out so far. Perhaps it would have been better to learn from counsel, rather than my own experience, on this. I seem to have a tendency to be quite short-sighted. I have good glasses for the physical type. Now to find something that brings my vision in line spiritually.
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  16

  a little confused

  by emilyblue in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i think my head is a little messed up from my recent relationship with a man who is a jw.

  i attended a few meetings and bible studies with an older woman who i met at the first meeting.

  i am not going to become a jw because i can't give up holidays and birthdays, but i do have a few questions.

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  Fred E Hathaway

  to emilyblue: These certainly are days of analysis for you. Morality. Maturity. The potential of a person. The value of others whose customs and traditions differ from what you're used to. The meaning of a friend, and where you find them. The value of even a "very strict" lifestyle, and "narrow" beliefs. The treacherousness of any person's heart, even of one "raised" with good values. The benefits of counsel, over experience. "A big deal" may become "not a big deal at all", with the benefit of hindsight. Also, what was "not such a big deal" may conversely become "of major importance" when new evidence is uncovered, as you're rediscovering.

  "Sucked in" is wonderful, if life is simplified, choices are healthier, and stress is relieved. It's terrible if, on the other hand, you feel extra anxiety, and life is more clouded. I think that the speed of your job resignation shows the likelihood of your experience. After all, Jehovah's Witnesses are often in favor of what is called "non-blood-primed cell salvage". In the case of surgery, this termed is used where blood loss is minimized by "sucking in" the blood that would otherwise be lost, and cleaning it and reusing it for your your own recovery. Education comes in many ways. The Bible study with JWs may have given you an ironic advantage and blessing that is helping even your now-ex, as he is forced to face himself more head-on. Sometimes decisions we make have unexpected downsides, but this one may come to have a number of unexpected upsides, as you get to know and love Jehovah, whom you may have otherwise not recognized the value of having as your best friend.
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  83

  I think I did a really bad thing.

  by emilyblue in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i do not attend the same hall as my boyfriend because he is currently reproved for being involved with me.

  i'm not a witness.

  he confessed to his elders that he had sex with someone outside of marriage after his second divorce was already final.

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  Fred E Hathaway

  To emilyblue:

  Now that you've put in your notice to quit your teaching job effective the end of this semester, watch him now try to follow you, as if his job prospects might improve, or as if he can prevent disaster following him. No, now that you've said your piece to your study conductor, he'll be facing his music in short order from his congo, if he hasn't already had to face it. If you keep your Bible study up where you go, you'll have the best protection from him. I wish you all the best putting Jehovah in the hole in your heart, rather than bemoaning your loss and being a sucker again on the rebound. Men have to earn respect and trust by taking their lumps like men should, rather than trying to get you to take their sorry side, even if they do make you laugh sometimes.
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  22

  Post memorial post

  by Woodsman in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  sorry to still be talking about the memorial but i have been busy.

  well i wanted to tell you about this.

  you know from my avatar and comments that i have been looking into religions and their descriptions of ufos and extraterrestrials in their holy books.

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  Fred E Hathaway

  to found-my-way:

  That would be cool, as in awesome, to hear a talk by one of the anointed. It won't be me that snickers at you. I don't miss a Memorial for the world. Not since I was first invited back in 1990. I wouldn't want to "cheapen" the event by partaking; I don't have a relationship with Jehovah and Jesus like the anointed brother you speak of; I don't have a calling like that. Earth is (actually) still home to me, after all.
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  83

  I think I did a really bad thing.

  by emilyblue in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i do not attend the same hall as my boyfriend because he is currently reproved for being involved with me.

  i'm not a witness.

  he confessed to his elders that he had sex with someone outside of marriage after his second divorce was already final.

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  Fred E Hathaway

  It's hard when we don't live by our own standards. We choose our own consequences, after all. You found a friend that he doesn't like. It tells a lot about him when he can't accept your choices.
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  83

  I think I did a really bad thing.

  by emilyblue in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i do not attend the same hall as my boyfriend because he is currently reproved for being involved with me.

  i'm not a witness.

  he confessed to his elders that he had sex with someone outside of marriage after his second divorce was already final.

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  Fred E Hathaway

  For him to have Jehovah's blessing, he needs to come completely clean with the elders and have his words and actions match with his age and responsibilities. You're getting Jehovah's blessing by facing up to real life and learning how to make better choices in life, including not enabling other people's infidelity to Jehovah (including being upfront with him, since the head of a woman is a man) and by continuing your spiritual progress, whether it means marrying him or ditching him. Remember that, if you marry him, you become under his law (this was the subject of yesterday's public Watchtower discussion). How will your relationship with him affect your relationship with Jehovah? It may ironically mean that, he's in a disfellowshipped state while you get baptized as a JW. Keep working with a clean conscience yourself and those who have the integrity to do the same. Anything else is just compromise.

  By the way, he's responsible for his actions and you're responsible for yours. You don't want to be unevenly yoked with an unbeliever. It works that way too.
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  213

  Ask Fred E Hathaway, a.k.a. Q. Bert

  by Fred E Hathaway in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  for those who feel that i've hijacked your thread(s), i'm still relatively new here, so your forgiveness (based on this acknowledgement and apology) is appreciated.

  i'm posting this link, http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/131766/2343640/post.ashx#2343640, on the other threads as soon as i can.

  bear with me as i attend to the necessary housework involved.. fred/q..

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  Fred E Hathaway

  I don't accept your testimony as proof regarding the serious allegations you make.
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  213

  Ask Fred E Hathaway, a.k.a. Q. Bert

  by Fred E Hathaway in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  for those who feel that i've hijacked your thread(s), i'm still relatively new here, so your forgiveness (based on this acknowledgement and apology) is appreciated.

  i'm posting this link, http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/131766/2343640/post.ashx#2343640, on the other threads as soon as i can.

  bear with me as i attend to the necessary housework involved.. fred/q..

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  Fred E Hathaway

  If I am legitimately shown how, I do my best.
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  213

  Ask Fred E Hathaway, a.k.a. Q. Bert

  by Fred E Hathaway in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  for those who feel that i've hijacked your thread(s), i'm still relatively new here, so your forgiveness (based on this acknowledgement and apology) is appreciated.

  i'm posting this link, http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/131766/2343640/post.ashx#2343640, on the other threads as soon as i can.

  bear with me as i attend to the necessary housework involved.. fred/q..

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  Fred E Hathaway

  Really? I'm just an "interested person", "NOT one of JWs". So, how do you figure?
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  213

  Ask Fred E Hathaway, a.k.a. Q. Bert

  by Fred E Hathaway in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  for those who feel that i've hijacked your thread(s), i'm still relatively new here, so your forgiveness (based on this acknowledgement and apology) is appreciated.

  i'm posting this link, http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/131766/2343640/post.ashx#2343640, on the other threads as soon as i can.

  bear with me as i attend to the necessary housework involved.. fred/q..

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  Fred E Hathaway

  Yes, in deed.